Monday, July 13, 2009

Order of the Epiphenomenon Accepting New Members

Announcement by Dixie Larkin, AoE Founding Member


Attention Cadets!


The Order of the Epiphenomenon (OOTE), the exclusive secret society of the Army of Epiphenomenon, is opening its private doors to 250 new recruits this year to celebrate 10 years since the inception of the OOTE.  This is an excellent opportunity for AoE members to ante up and join the select few who have dedicated their lives to upholding freedom and liberty by exposing and otherwise fighting the tyranny wrought by the evil Progressive/Neocons who hold this country in their dastardly clutches.


For just $250.00 (US), AoE members can apply for membership to the OOTE.  Successful applicants will receive this handsome patch (right) to adorn their favorite article of clothing, a complimentary one year subscription to the Official Semi-Sporadic AoE Newsletter which includes articles and commentary not available via the Official AoE Website, and dinner for two at the Order of the Epiphenomenon 10 year Gala, to be held in October at an undisclosed location.  All of this, plus myriad OOTE benefits that cannot be revealed here, because, after all, it is a secret society.


Those wishing to apply to the Order of the Epiphenomenon should use the email icon (top left) and put “OOTE Recruitment” in the subject line.  Each email should include:


Your name and contact information


How long you’ve been a member of the AoE and to which Chapter you belong


A brief essay (approx. 10,000 words) about why you should be admitted into the OOTE


Upon receipt of such an email, directions for submitting payment will be sent to you via return email, so please use an email address that you check often.  If you would rather receive correspondence via the USPS please indicate that in the email.


14 comments:

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Harrison said...

As soon as I get my stimulus check I'll send it in... although it might be an IOU do you accept those?

FOOTE D. BILL said...

What a steal! Seriously - only $250.00? Can I use the same word 10,000 times?

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