Saturday, August 30, 2008

McCain Regrets Drunken Promise

Report by Ed Steele, MN Chapter

The Republican ticket, it seems, is the result of a promise made by a drunken, horny Senator John McCain.  An unidentified source close to the Arizona Senator told the AoE  that three months ago, in a moment of alcohol-induced weakness, the Senator offered Alaska Governor Sarah Palin a place on the Republican ticket if she consented to an extramarital tryst.  Apparently driven by political ambition and an insatiable lust for sex, Palin eagerly agreed to let the inebriated McCain descend into the depths of her inner-being.

Although McCain attempted to renege on the perverse compact, Palin would not be dissuaded, and threatened to go public with the affair if she was not given the VP slot as promised.  Given Sarah Palin’s ties to Big Oil in Alaska, it seems that McCain has truly crawled in bed with Big Oil.  Many DC pundits are concerned that the one time “maverick” has been reduced to nothing more than a corporate boy toy.


Alex L said...

'Boy' toy might be a stretch, but i guess it sounds better than 'elderly man toy'

Chris Wood said...

A Republican candidate with ties to Big Oil? I think your cynicism has got the better of you there!

Satan perhaps, but big oil, never.

Ballard said...

This is the stupidest thing I've ever heard

AoE said...

Alex: Point taken

Chris: I've made that connection too :)

Ballard: Suck it!