Sunday, June 29, 2008

Phelps Attacks the AoE

Report by Derrin Fowell, MO Chapter

Perennial tool Fred Phelps, pictured here with grandsons Ernie and Lester, protested recently outside the home of Army of Epiphenomenon Missouri Chapter Commander Ryan Hanks, blaming recent midwest flooding on the sometimes mildly offensive articles published by the AoE. Phelps, who is best known for his trademark “God Hates Fags” picket signs, believes that until the AoE deposits $5.25 in a swear jar for some of the language used in various AoE published articles over the past year, God will continue to flood the midwest.

Ryan Hanks commented that he “would gladly pay 100 times that amount to anyone willing to help Phelps pull his head out.” As it was, Hanks hurled a handful of spare change at Phelps and shouted, “piss off and leave [expletive],” then tossed another quarter to cover the cost of that last metaphor.

2 comments:

Caleb said...

I hear that God likes loose change... Phelps may be right on this one, AoE should pay up just in case I think.

Plen T. of Rain said...

Can you put your visa number in the jar and keep an open tab with God? Or some other kind of overdraft protection? We really need it to stop raining.